Antoni(a) thank you so much for your comment and sharing some of your stories, I am so happy to be able to read them. I really appreciate the time and effort you used to be honest and vulnerable in writing this. These biocultural conflicts are a lot to manage and I am glad to be with you in transfeminine solidarity. I can definitely attest to feeling emotionally flat, hypervigilant, and dysphoric before realizing with the help of spearmint essential oil under my tongue that I am not comfortable with how testosterone impacts me.

For me, there's no such thing as passing (because it is you who makes Aretha Franklin feel like a natural woman...), my titties are incidental, and I think everyone is just trying to tell the hole story. I also recommend the book Nobody Passes: Rejecting the Rules of Gender and Conformity by Mattilda Bernstein Sycamore (https://www.amazon.com/Nobody-Passes-Rejecting-Gender-Conformity/dp/1580051847) and think you might appreciate their work.